Sunday, October 16, 2011

My resolve is slipping. :(

What is wrong and how do I get it back??

Today I ate:
Shepherd's pie - most of the bowl
Sauerkraut, two sausages, gerkins and a slice of sour rye bread
Rest of shepherd's pie

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Today I ate:
Shepherd's pie
Bacon deluxe burger, diet coke
Coke Zero (felt sick after this much aspartame I tipped most of it down the toilet)

Friday, October 14, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Chicken wrap - chicken (no stuffing), lettuce, tomato, onion, mayo in a wheat wrap - I tried to eat around the wrap at the top and the bottom but I ate the middle
Enchiladas - again I tried to eat around the corn wraps but I did end up eating most of it

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Today I ate:
Bacon, eggs, tomato and sauted mushrooms (not homemade)
Chicken & prawn curry

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Today I ate:
1/2 Protein drink
Cream of mushroom soup
Grilled cheese on salami

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Sausage stroganoff
Cooked onion, tomato and egg scramble
2 tsp cream

Monday, October 10, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Sausage stroganoff
Cream & ABC spread
Two eggs with half a tomato and that cooked onion I was craving

Catch up

Wow I am so tired tonight and I didn't realise I hadn't updated since Thursday.

So here are the stats then I'm going to SLEEEEEEEP

Friday:
Protein drink
Chicken and mushroom curry
Tandoori chicken with cabbage (ate at restaurant)

Saturday:
Bacon and eggs
Smoked salmon with cream cheese
Shepherd's pie

Sunday:
Shepherd's pie
Caesar salad with chicken sans croutons

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Tuna curry lasagne (replacement noodle sheets of course)
Salad with ranch dressing

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Zucchini pesto sausage bake
Egg and veggie scramble

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Chicken & prawn curry
Egg and veggie scramble - cabbage, zucchini, tomato and spring onion

Monday, October 3, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Chicken & prawn curry
Celery sticks with ABC nut spread

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Today I ate:
Ham, mushroom & tomato omelette.
100g smoked salmon with cream cheese
Two spoonfuls of cream

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Today I ate:
Shepherd's pie x 2 - I'm addicted!!

Friday, September 30, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Chicken & prawn curry
Shepherd's pie
3 tsp cream

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Today I ate:
1/2 protein drink
2 x servings of shepherd's pie

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Today I ate:
1/2 Protein drink
Zucchini, pork and pesto bake
Egg, bacon and veggie scramble

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Rest of yesterday's stir fry which was a mix of veggies (cabbage, green beans, mushrooms) with chopped prociutto & bacon, and a touch of soy sauce - I had these left overs mostly at lunch and then the small remainder at dinner
I also had a glass of white wine

Monday, September 26, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Zucchini, pork and pesto bake
Stir fried veggies with prociutto and bacon

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Today I ate:
Two eggs and a piece of bacon
Chicken, beans and mushroom curry with salad
Veggie soup with lamb

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Today I ate:
Three eggs with leftover kebab meat from Thursday
Caesar salad sans croutons
Some pumpkin soup (about 1/3 of the bowl)
Creamy cocktail ... bad for the carbs
Steak with salad - I left the mash on the plate
Caramel dessert - I ate this in full...

Friday, September 23, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Shepherd's pie
Egg and bacon w tomato sauce
Mixture of Indian meats, and one slice of cottage cheese stuffed naan
A glass of milk (the Indian was hot!)
SF sprite with a touch of scotch

I didn't end up finish the drink because not one... but two! ... bugs decided to drown themselves in it. Seriously?! I have no idea why they did that...

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Today I ate:
1/2 protein drink
Sausage stroganoff
1/2 lamb kebab

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Small serving of lc shepherd's pie
Protein drink
Lamb and veggie soup

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Lc shepherd's pie
50g smoked salmon

Monday, September 19, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Fish, fennel and bacon pie with cauliflower mash on top

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Today I ate:
Leftover kebab meat with tomato and eggs (I'm getting sick of kebab meat, no matter how yummy it is)
Garlic prawns with fried zucchini and celery

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Today I ate:
Bacon and eggs with tomato
Chilli con carne with bacon and cheese (made for my by my lovely fiance, he had his with rice)
And diet coke

Friday, September 16, 2011

Today I ate:
Bacon, eggs and tomato
Protein drink
Leek and parsnip soup

(I tried my best not to have a protein drink today - I don't think it's good to have the same thing over and over again, no matter what it is - but no such luck. Work was so busy I didn't get a break so I just slammed down the drink)

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Chicken and prawn curry
Chicken kebab with salad

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Fish, egg and spring onion mix with broccoli and cauliflower (large enough serving for some at lunch and the rest after yoga)
Protein drink

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Curried tuna lasagne
Leftover chicken and kebab meat with three eggs and some added veggies

Monday, September 12, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Two serves (1.5 at lunch, other 0.5 when I get home from work) of chilli tuna and zucchini quiche. All homemade of course

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Today I ate:
Leftover chicken and prawn curry
Leek and parsnip soup
Curried tuna lasagne
Boiled broccoli on the side for dinner

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Today I ate:
Omelette made out of leftover veggies from yesterday and leftover chicken kebab meat from dinner the day before (2 serves a few hours apart)
Whisky MmmmMmmMmmm .... approx 4-5shot glasses in total (each tasting is called a 'Dram')
Mixed chicken and lamb kebab meat with salad

Friday, September 9, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
LC Shepherd's pie
Protein drink (only a little bit, I was starving by 6pm)
Lemon barramundi with broccoli and cabbage

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Chicken & Prawn curry
Chicken kebab

Day 2

Today I ate:
Protein drink
Curried eggs in lettuce wraps (the equivalent of around 3-4eggs) eaten throughout the day - homemade
Protein drink
Leek and parsnip soup - homemade

Tuesday 6 Sept 11

My dinner tonight, as you can see below, is prawn and chicken curry. It had lots of sauce left over. Yesterday I would have got out some bread and soaked it up. Today I have had to put a bit more thought into it. So, my current thought is I will boil some eggs and mash the sauce into them so I have curried eggs. Then I can give some to my housemate for sandwiches, and I can have some with lettuce. Yum!

Today I ate:
Protein drink
LC shepherd's pie
Chicken and prawn curry

Setting a start date

Thanks for your kind words SheZug. I did Comment back but with all the Google upgrades and account merging they are doing these days, unfortunately I can log in here to make a post but not use the same log in to reply to a Comment.

Bizarre.

So anyway, I was saying that the encouragement is much appreciated. Unfortunately it hasn't helped me get started yet, but at least I am prepared when I do ;) ... which ironically is what this post is about.

I'd like to know how you are travelling as well SheZug :)


Getting started...

I am completely at a stand still with getting started. I think about it all the time. I think about all the reasons why. I try different ways of convincing myself to get started.

I put a lot of thought into trying to figure out where the block is. Why don't I want to get started? Surely the carbs I give up are nothing compared to the benefits I would reap. Right?

My current idea is that maybe setting a start date would be the key. Or at least a key to get me moving on this slope.

So I'm going to set something realistic (ie. tomorrow is not realistic). Then I can see the date getting closer and closer and it wont feel as jarring when it arrives.

That's the theory anyway.

And the winning date is .....

Wednesday 31st August!

Cooking

Did a whole bunch of lc cooking this weekend. Portioned into containers so I have lunches and dinners made for the whole week.

Well, that was the idea. Got part of the way, just not 14 portions yet.

I have:
2 x chicken and prawn curry with "rice"
1 x fish fry with roasted veggies
2 x shepherd's pie
1 x leek and parsnip soup

So only 6 out of 14, and it took me all day.

New scales!

I bought a set of scales today! I haven't really had any proper scales in my whole life.

Sadly now that I have bought them I have lost motivation to make food changes but hopefully it will come back soon.

Still Kicking

Still kicking along. I have an aversion of some kind to losing weight and I can't quite put my finger on why. I know there are a lot of pros, I know there are a lot of cons. Why do I lean one way more than the other?

Trying to find motivation

It's the age-old problem, trying to find motivation for losing weight. It doesn't make any sense to only put some effort into this once I cause a health problem. But it seems that's the track I am on. How ridiculous.

Repeat repeat repeat

Well I haven't got anything new to say. Just the same as I always do.

My theory is if I don't have anything new that can help me, I may as well just keep repeating the same stuff over and over until I get it through my thick head.

So today I think I will list all the positive things I get out of being fat, and then see if I can find their exact opposite which might eventually help me make a change.

What living a fat lifestyle has going for it:

• Every option at a restaurant is open to choose from
• I can eat a range of unpackaged and prepackaged foods as I choose
• I can eat anything friend's provide when I visit them for dinner
• Going out for drinks with friends is always an option
• I don't have to take food with me if I stay over at a friend's or otherwise wont get home/to a kitchen to make food
• I can skip meals if I want to
• I don't have to deal with comments from people about my weight changing
• I don't have to get up early to prepare breakfast or any meal
• I enjoy feeling like I'm not attracting anyone's attention when I walk passed

And now the other side of the coin, what being skinny has going for it:

• I will spontaneously go out with the bf and his mates without thinking inside that he might get picked on by his friends for me being fat
• I wont have to move so far over to squish passed people in a small opening
• Less backfat from a bra
• I wont have to squish my fat arms in so much at the theatre/cinema/anywhere I have to sit next to someone
• I will be able to cross my legs again! And, no, I don't mean the ankle cross, I mean up at the thigh!
• I wont have to fuss over how clothes are sitting on me to cover up particular areas
• I will have more energy in the morning from good foods that I will want to get up a touch earlier to actually do my hair, more than a quick brush or put in a pony tail
I will have a general feeling of being able to move around better, taking up less space
• I wont have such heavy footsteps when walking around
• I'll be able to go caving without wondering about moving around and getting through spaces and my general size

And the reality of living now:

• I find it hard to find clothes
• I get grumpy in yoga because I can't move parts of me certain ways due to my [insert body part here] getting in the way
• I get pins and needles way too easily and often
• I worry I'm judged at work because of my size
• I feel messy when I eat around people, like I have a fat face that is just scoffing food
• Sex life could be better
• I just feel large, generally large

How did I get here?

• I used to be the skinny friend, the more attractive one. I had way too many passes from friends' boyfriends that I think being fat has made that situation much easier to deal with
• I like feel indulgent with food - though often I don't take advantage of the fact I can be
• I want people to judge me on who I am solely, not in combination with how I look... though I would like to get it into my head that this isn't possible
• I honestly don't think I look that large ... but I do and I need to get this into my head

I need to get it into my head that:

• I look larger than I think I look
• People judge me based on my appearance regardless of whether it's attractive or not
• I wont magically have a predator after me just because I'm thinner
• I can handle any sexual advance I may receive
• I wont out-shine my friends because I'm thin
• It's ok to out-shine people sometimes, I can't keep keeping myself down
• Following a weight loss plan doesn't have to take over my social life
• There are only positives to losing weight, no negatives

Pending

Well I got off to a terrible start, as my previous post will show.

I woke up with a nasty cold on Monday and now that it's Wednesday I'm trying to get my head around re-starting. I still haven't got through all the reading as my mind is full of fog (not to mention other stuff which my three boxes of tissues are helping clear) so I still don't have a proper understanding of what I should be doing. And I still don't know how I'm going to work my existing life into it, even though I know it's only for a "few weeks".

Back to work again tomorrow and I'm not organised at all.

One bonus I can say is that I've taken the opportunity to get all of the caffeine reliance out of my system (it takes 72hrs right?).

Day 1

Well off to a bit of a rocky start to Day 1 of my 12-Week challenge.

Woke up with tonsils the size of golf balls and it's dark outside in the mornings these days. Grabbed the two protein drinks I'd prepared last night and the meat and salad container and headed off to work.

Left work just passed 11am, feeling like death.

It's currently 1.15pm and I have had that protein drink while at work and the salad while home. I'll have the other pre-prepared drink tomorrow so I don't have to make up any new ones.

Feeling hungry, want to eat the easiest thing laying around. Could do with a good milky coffee too.

Can only blame myself though - I've had two out of the six meals for today and it's passed lunch time, I've also only had one out of the 12 glasses of water I'm supposed to have. Feeling a bit out of sorts.

Had a HUGE weekend this weekend and last weekend so I didn't have the 'few hours' to go over all of the rules and guidelines and also my exercise plan. Honestly though, I am booked in for Yoga tonight, not sure if I want to change it to something more rigorous. I want to get well.

I keep fighting the urge to argue with the food plan and my "I know better" attitude lol. I think I'm doing ok with it so far though. But it's still early.

So that's the update so far.

Feeling under prepared, hungry but don't want to eat, haven't had enough to drink, have a headache, aching joints and a nose that wont stop (obviously not related to food, I've caught a bug from someone).

EDIT: OK I don't get this AT ALL. How if I don't get home from work until 5pm and I have Yoga 6-7pm am I supposed to cook and eat dinner? A. Where is my travelling time, and B. how do I get there and not be absolutely stuffed I can't morph myself into those positions???

I've got the flu.