Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Tuesday 6 January 2009

Master Cleanse - Day 3




See the links to the right to read my current mission in order



Awwww you guys are so gorgeous. It lit up my morning to read such wonderful Comments :)

It's 8.15am, it look a little while for me to get to sleep last night as I'm sure you might have gathered. I'm annoyed at the timetablers not being able to read my mind, and I'm annoyed that I've had all this time to lose weight but I put it off for so long that now I actually need it and I'm under-prepared.

OK that's enough inner-dialogue for now. I'm back to normal this morning. I started with one of the drinks and feeling just fine. Actually, yesterday I woke up half an hour before my alarm went off, and today I woke up an hour before my alarm. I feel nice and rested too. Didn't do the salt water flush, I just haven't gathered up the guts yet.

It's 9.20am, had a bit of water. Not really hungry. Actually I'm quite enjoying not having to think about food - what I'm going to have next, whether I will get to have my break at the right time, how much of my break I might lose if I buy it, getting up early in the morning to organise something. It's kinda nice.

It's 10.45am and I'm starving! Can't wait for the next shift to get here so I can go have one of those drinks. I've nearly finished a whole bottle of water this morning but it's not satisfying me.

It's 11.15am and I'm about to have that drink I've been dying for. I think I'm getting delirious - I thought for a second the bulldog clip on my desk was a piece of chocolate. LOL!

It's 12.40pm and I'm genuinely hungry. No amount of water or cleanse drinks are going to help this time. I'm trying to concentrate on what I'm doing and people are walking through the door with food in their hands, asking if I want any. I can't even have a coffee and the girls went for a trip to the good coffee place. I'm glad I have Thur and Fri off work this week (it's still skeleton staff this time of year - it's summer holidays after all).

It's 2.40pm, I'm thinking it wasn't the best idea to start this challenge the week before TOM hehe. I'm not doing much better than a few hours ago. Still hungry and questioning myself. Maybe I would lose just as much eating food? I usually don't crave carby foods but I've been eyeing off everyone's rolls and noodles today.

Maybe this is just a hump I need to overcome. Maybe it will get easier? It's funny, I've just realised that I had totally forgotten what PROPER cravings feel like. Not those silly little psychological once we deal with everyday when trying to change to this WOE, but proper physical cravings. It's interesting.

Maybe I could find a food that has the same carb and cal count as my drinks and have that instead? I'm onto drink three now for today. They are 34 cals, 4g carbs each. I'm hungry because I've only had 102 cals today. I just want to go home to bed.

It's 6pm and I'm at home with my shoes off. Feeling better. The last hour or so I was totally vague and I blamed my focus on the heat to the others at work. It did hit 30C today though, so there is some truth to it. I don't handle the heat very well. Wanting food really strongly now.

It's 7.35pm and I think my resolve is slipping a bit. The thing that's getting me through is "it's just a day" and then tomorrow is just another. It's really silly that I can't do 14 of them. Of course I can!!

It's 9.45pm and I'm getting ready for bed. Feeling positive. It's only a few more days and I can wait it out. I don't know why I get a bee in my bonnet sometimes. I made the salt water flush today in prep for tomorrow. One sniff of it though and the memories come rushing back - I don't think I'll be able to do it. We'll see. I usually wake up with undeterred optimism and it slowly fades as the day goes on hahaha.

1 comment:

  1. I hope your optimism is in full-effect today, Erika! You absolutely can do this!

    Thinking about it one-day-at-a-time is a good approach, I think. After all, if it wasn't a helpful strategy, why would all the 12-step support groups (like Alcoholics Anonymous) use it? I think I utilize it on a subconscious level too.

    In addition to any cleansing and weight loss benefits this challenge will bring ... just remember that it can also deliver an even stronger sense of what you're capable of. The more challenges we overcome (especially those that seem out-of-reach) the more stock we put into our own self-worth. And that can continue to build and build. From there, we can use that self-worth to help in all areas of our lives. That's one thing I try to keep in mind - because I think it's true.

    Keep on going strong! You've done great and I'm confident that you can take this as far as you decide is right for you. :)

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